CHAPTERS Chapter Five Here’s something you never hear people talking about. I had extra breast tissue under my armpit area that I first noticed in 5th grade. It seemed like a lump and when I showed my Mom, she made an appointment with our doctor right away. I didn’t know it at the time, but we have a family history of breast cancer so Mom must have been freaking. But she acted calm, so I never really worried. It turned out to be nothing, just extra tissue. It’s just one of those things, but of course when you’re 10, you want to be exactly like every other girl. Why do some girls get hair around their breasts? Actually, why do I have hair there?! I knew I would get pubic hair but not this! Is it normal or something I should be worried about? Do nipples get much bigger when breasts are fully developed? I told a “friend” that I had a nipple hair. Next thing I know, I’m walking down the hall at school and the captain of the football team says, “Hey nipple hair, how’s it going?” I could have JUST DIED! I have larger nipples than most girls. When I'm wearing a thin-cup bra, it looks like I have lumps on top of my breasts! My sister and Mom’s nipples stick out like they’re supposed out. But mine stick in. I thought that was supposed to be genetic? I asked my mom why her nipples pointed down! That did not make her happy. One of my friends felt bad about the black hair around her areola — thinking she couldn’t do anything about it. She grew up with her Dad and didn't feel comfortable asking him so I became her confidant. Right in the middle of French, this boy started laughing and pointing at my breasts. I looked down and saw why—it was like you could see right through my shirt to my nipples. I wanted to die of embarrassment! My nipples sometimes leak! Is that breast milk? My best friend told me that she had “nipple envy.” She wished she could have tiny nipples like mine but her areolas are really dark and big. I told her I wish I had bigger breasts like hers. I wonder if we’re weird to talk about this stuff! My brother threw a football at me and hit me smack on my right nipple. It really hurt but I didn’t want him to know too much about me—he’s like ten years old—so I just pretended it didn’t hurt that bad. That was yesterday and my nipple is still sore! I wonder why my bra sometimes feels a little damp on the inside. Maybe my breasts are sweating or something? I never take my sports bra off in the locker room. Ever! It’s not because I have such big breasts. I’m actually kind of flat. It’s because my nipples are humongous! My mom said not to worry…but she doesn’t know how mean people can be. And so far, looking around, I haven’t seen another girl with nipples like mine. I’m on the swim team and when I first dive into the water, my nipples get really hard. It doesn’t hurt, but I feel a little self-conscious when I climb out of the pool.
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